Breathe out

Last week, I informed my boss that I was quitting by phone. I know this is not the way things should be done, but he is impossible to reach and I preferred telling him sooner rather than later. His response to my call was, "Ok, come by the store and we can talk about it in person." So much for me saving time/energy, but at least I got the hard part -- the part about not coming back to work -- over and done with.

So today was the day to go in and see him. I was nervous about it, I guess because my boss and his wife have been so good to me and I felt like I was letting them down somehow. I know that he is also partially responsible because he changed his mind about my paperwork, but regardless... I suppose I just felt I owed them something.

But you know what? He was really wonderful to me today. We chatted for at least an hour and he talked about everything. We discussed my future, his experiences raising his kids, his own break-up with someone after over ten years together. He assured me that he thought I was making the right choice, and then he went on to tell me his plans for the business over the next few years. It turns out that I am not really inconveniencing him at all, as he is completely restructuring -- but I won't get into detail about it here. Let's just say that it involves some enormous changes for him and, possibly, a good reason for the two of us to stay in contact in the future.

Then I went to see the accountant and my coworkers, as well as the most smiley Parisian woman I know (who works one store over). All of them ooohed over Mateo, and he was perfectly content to ham it up for them. We got a few giggles out of him and everyone got to hold him for awhile. I was so glad he was mellow and happy with everybody; it gave me a chance to tell them about my decision while still distracting us enough to keep smiling.

Overall, I felt so good walking out of there, knowing I had the full support of the mini-family I have come to know at work. I am also thrilled to know I'll get my vacation pay, on top of the last bit of maternity leave payments. Seriously, France is pretty awesome in that regard.

At any rate, having those necessary conversations today unblocked something that has been eating away at me, and now I feel I can mentally make the jump to my life back "home". I am so grateful to have the blessing of all of my friends here -- coworkers included -- and that I am leaving this country with so many positive ties and memories. It's bittersweet, of course, but overall it helps me to think that at least I have been doing some things right over the last eight years.