Seeeneeemah

So when my neighbor's hand started crawling, I tried to make it clear that I knew what he was up to and wasn't having any of it. I shifted sharply in my seat and said, "Excuse me," in an authoritative tone. He quickly put his hand back on the armrest, but a few minutes later it was back on my side of the seat, but this time it was sitting like a dead fish, palm up next to my thigh.

I decided it was time for a mild confrontation (the movie hadn't started yet, we were just watching advertisements and pre-official movie previews). I turned towards him quickly and with purpose, and that's when I realized he was ASLEEP. Which would explain why his hand had been invading my space by dangling, not so much by actively seeking. Suddenly, I was struck with a much more awkward dilemna: do I wake him up and let him know that I don't mind if he sleeps in the cinema, but could he please do it while leaning the other way?

I opted instead for another sharp movement, hoping he would wake up and be a little embarassed at how much space he had consumed. I jerked, he sat upright, and we both resettled into a better position.

And then he promptly fell back asleep.

I realized I wouldn't be able to enjoy the movie if I spent half the time worrying about what his hands were doing, and I started looking for seats I could easily access. Right at that moment, the lights dimmed and the movie started.

As the credits rolled, I wondered what I was going to do, while my neighbor perked up. As the actors' names flashed across the screen, I scanned the audience for spots, and then the title popped up and I knew my chance to make an out was over.

"Merde!" muttered the guy next to me, "Excuse me," he said, getting up and jogging his way out of the cinema.

Problem solved. My sleepy neighbor was just in the wrong theater. I guess he really WAS tired.

So then I had three seats to myself: ideal viewing situation.