Four things

1. It turns out that the assistantship program decided to just sort of not let us know that they weren't renewing our contracts. I'm somewhat ok with it because I'm sure I can find work elsewhere - even though it might not be as good of a job and I'll miss my coworkers. Bizarrelly, these things usually end up being a blessing in disguise for me. I tend to get all worked up about the injustice of it all, and then realize it's better for me this way in the end. Something bigger and better usually comes along. But, still. I'm angry about the principle of it all: it's super uncool of the program's administration to just not inform us that we most likely won't have jobs next fall. I know several people who are counting on coming back to a monthly paycheck once they're here. I found out about the fact that those paychecks may not ever become a reality through the unofficial web site. If I'm getting my info there first, that means the administration is not getting info out to renewing assistants as they should. What about all those other people planning on renewing who don't check the web site? When are they going to find out? August?

2. I'm leaving for Asia in two weeks. Monday or Wednesday will be the definitive day of tying up loose ends: I have a doctor's appointment Monday morning for malaria pills. I have already gotten mad amounts of mega-strong bug spray. I have invested in my super stylish Tevas (and you thought that was an oxymoron...). All that's left is the backpack. I've been eyeing a few from afar, and so Wednesday will probably be the day when the finalists meet up in a face-off for my love. I also have to up and buy myself some granny-style cotton panties because let's face it: there's no way I'm bringing my usual skivvies to Laos and thereabouts - a) they're too nice and b) they're too s-e-x-y. I just can't see myself sitting in Cambodia in anything other than veeerrry breatheable cotton digs. Looking over all two pairs of pants and three t-shirts I'm bringing along for the trek, I can't see how not having the hottest of panties is going to in any way throw my game off. I will be the definition of hot in my drawstring flowy thingies, plain old t-shirts, and beige Tevas. Bring on the Cambodian men!

3. Ronald Reagan died. We all saw it coming, but I'm still a bit in shock about it. I'm not really upset about his actual death, although it must have been tough on the family. No, his death guts me in a much less kind and profound way: it means I'm now at the point where I can remember presidents who die. This is a frightening thought. I'm getting old, and I'm doing so faster than I think. Over dinner this evening, I was just telling The Boy that I am destined to shake my head and remember the good times by saying, "Back when Clinton was president..." when I'm 80. I'm going to sound just like my grandma talking about FDR or something. The day Clinton goes is going to be a dark one. Because let's face it: I'm not going to remember the good times as having anything to do with Bush. I'll probably rejoice when he goes. Shit, there I go again. Hell in a handbasket. I can hear the wicker burning already.

4. I had to pay my landlord two months' rent plus the electricty bill in one go because of my trip. I pay it all in cash. When I saw the beautiful array of brown, blue, and red notes lying on my coffee table, I had a moment of wondering why I don't live in Kentucky where the rent would be a helluva lot cheaper. All those bills! All those colors! It was painful to do the handoff and I am still aching from it.